Below you will find the Parenting Guide for week 7 of the Sermon on the Mount Series (Matthew 5:31-32).
See this post from week 1 for more information about the parenting guides.
The Sermon Resource Guide will be released later this week and will include answers to questions that were submitted during Sunday’s sermon, Divorce and the Christian Life.
This post is the second in a four-part series on “Preparing Leaders for Battling Porn in the Church” and is adapted from an internal message that was sent out to all of our Gospel Community (GC) Leaders (men only) a week prior to me preaching on “Lust and the Christian Life.”
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3. If this is an issue for you, I want to talk about it with you. Again, I know you’re not immune, I know you’re not sinless, but if this is an issue for you, we (me and you) need to talk. Send me a message and say you want to talk about this.
4. If you are battling lust, porn, and/or masturbation, you will not be automatically disqualified as a GC Leader. You need to hear that because I don’t want you to hide out because you’re afraid of being found out or afraid of losing your role. With that said, habitual sin must be addressed. As a leader, Hebrews 13:7 points to the fact that others are imitating you. That ought to scare the ba-jeebers out of you. Other men are actually looking at your life and saying, “I want to be that kind of a man.” If you are trapped in habitual sin, we may need to have you step down as a GC Leader for a season to address your sin. The reason is simple, we need men leading GCs who, if given to sin in this area, are making progress – men who are being progressively sanctified and waging war in this area. You are leading others which means you need to be seriously concerned about the state of your own heart. If you’re stuck, I love you too much for you to remain stuck. You don’t have to put on a fake spirituality for the sake of your role. How “habitual” is defined is gray. That’s why we need to meet and talk.
To be continued…
This post is the first in a four-part series on “Preparing Leaders for Battling Porn in the Church.” This series is a slightly modified and adapted version of an internal message that was sent out to all of our Gospel Community (GC) Leaders (men only) a week prior to me preaching on “Lust and the Christian Life” in our current sermon series on the Sermon on the Mount. You can catch the audio of that sermon HERE if you are interested. The internal message to our leaders is being re-posted here with a desire to serve the greater Church in battling against the problem of lust, pornography, and masturbation in the local church.
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GC Leader Men,
As I continue to prayerfully prepare for this week’s sermon on lust, I am continually being challenged. The issue of lust, porn, and masturbation is a huge one. If I had a dime for every man in 2 Pillars that I’ve talked to about these issues, I’d have a couple of bucks… and we’re not that big of a church… and most men aren’t talking about it.
As I have prayed and sought wisdom from God, he has placed on my heart a few things that I feel need to be shared specifically with you men as you are placed in a role to lead other men.
1. I know you’re not immune. You need to hear that and I want you to hear that before Sunday morning. I know you are not immune from the temptations that come regarding lust, porn, and masturbation. You are not perfect. I don’t expect you to be perfect. I’m not perfect or immune either. Nearly all of you have heard me talk about my own struggles – especially during my college years. Those images, that damage, those consequences for my sin – they do not simply or instantly go away. I am still dealing with the effects of all of that. By God’s grace, he has progressively (and painfully) sanctified me a ton in this area – but I’m still not perfect. I’m not immune. And neither are you.
2. Lust is a sin, viewing pornography is a sin, and masturbating is almost always a sin. I will establish all of this on Sunday morning but I want there to be no room for lack of clarity here. Most everyone will agree with the first two (even if they still lust and view porn). The last one (masturbating) seems to be the one that people will try to create all kinds of janky and creative paths around to excuse their sin. Masturbating is almost always sin. I carefully say “almost always” because I suppose you can make some argument that within the union of marriage there is freedom of expression of sexual desires given that both partners are present and comfortable with the act. You need to know this because we need to call sin, “sin.” If you don’t agree with this point (and if I don’t convince you on Sunday morning), we need to talk. Send me a message and let’s set up a time. This is an important issue for us to agree on because you are a leader of other men under the umbrella of 2 Pillars Church. We must be united on this.
To be continued….
This past Sunday I preached from Matthew 5:27-30 on the topic of lust. In the sermon I gave seven points that I feel need to be said clearly and succinctly to men regarding the topics of lust, porn, and masturbation. Below is a summary of those seven points:
1. It’s a War
You have an enemy and he is strong. The reality of temptation that exists is real. It’s a war and you need to start acting like it. If you’re a Christian man, you’ve been called up. Consider yourself drafted.
2. Everyone is Affected by War
Your sin, no matter how private, has effects. Don’t weasel your way out of this thing by saying, “Oh, well… this is private, it’s none of your business.” War is everyone’s business because war affects everyone. Your relationship with God is being affected. Your relationship with your spouse or future spouse is being affected and your relationship with your kids or future kids is being affected. When it comes to thinking about your kids, dads, your daughters need a hero – not a porn addict. Your sons need a general – not a shot-up soldier laying on the gurney next to them.
3. You Need to Know Your Enemy
Your enemy is sin. Lust is sin. Viewing pornography is sin. Masturbating is almost always sin (the only exception being potentially in the context of marriage where both partners are present and comfortable with the act). You single guys are not the exception. You married guys looking at porn are not the exception. You married guys masturbating without your wife present are not the exception. To summarize: you’re not the exception. Sin is sin. If you don’t agree with the fact that it’s sin, you need a better theology of sex and sexual sin. Bottom line on this one: you need to be convicted from Scripture that lust, porn, and masturbating are sinful acts. You need to know your enemy.
4. It’s Not Enough to Just Be “In” the War
Nobody goes to war just to be in the war – unless you’re France. No, you go to war to win the war. As the church, we should not and will not be satisfied with a bunch of dudes getting together and commiserating over their porn addictions in the name of accountability. We want to see some battles won. By God’s grace you can begin to experience some victory.
5. The Consequences of War are Real
Some of you have been playing too many video games. You think that if you get shot, no big deal, you’ve got eight more lives. If that’s you, you’re a fool. Jesus says if you don’t deal with this, if you’re not waging war against your sin, taking it seriously – if it’s habitual, or you like it, or you’re really not interested in changing – you’re headed on a path to hell. That’s not a statement of justification by works, that’s a statement of the fact that real Christians are convicted by their sin and desire to change.
6. The War Isn’t “Out There”
This is a civil war. The problem is inside your heart. Married men, don’t fall into the trap of blaming your wife for your sin in this area. If you’re the guy that thinks you wouldn’t sin in this way if your wife would just have sex with you three times a day: 1) you need some self control, and 2) this is not her fight – it’s yours. You single men, some of you are mad at God. You think it’s His fault that you sin in this way – if he’d just send you a wife or if he’d just not have these silly rules… Married and single alike need to hear this: OWN YOUR SIN.
7. We’re In This Together
You don’t want to be on the battlefield alone. You need a band of brothers around you. If you struggle with lust, porn, and/or masturbation and have never told anyone about it, I am gravely concerned for you. If you’re not plugged-in and connected with a church that is creating a community centered on the gospel of Jesus, I’m gravely concerned for you. Satan has a stronghold on you as long as you keep this in the realm of taboo and in the dark. He has a stronghold on you as long as you’re battling this alone without other men who love Jesus and his gospel. You need some other men around you to help you fight.
For more on this topic, as well as some practical help in overcoming and applying the gospel to the problem of lust, porn, and masturbation, see the sermon: Lust and the Christian Life.
You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell. And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body go into hell.
Matthew 5:27-30 ESV
Due to the nature of the this week’s passage and the focused attention of pastor Todd in dealing with the topics of concern, there will not be a parenting guide released this week.
This week’s Sermon Resource Guide consists of links to the following books and online resources.
As Pastor Todd stated in his sermon on Sunday, please don’t attempt to deal with lust, sexual sin, or pornography addiction alone. Work through the material below in community with other men or women. In 2 Pillars Church, for example, this is best done in the context of a Gospel Community.
When the Problem is Sexual Sin: A Counselor Model | CCEF
Breaking Pornography Addiction Part 1 | CCEF
Breaking Pornography Addiction Part 2 | CCEF
Porn Again Christian | The Resurgence
When Your Husband is Addicted to Pornography: Healing for Your Wounded Heart | Vick Tiede (New Growth, Release Date: October 1, 2012)
Below you will find the Parenting Guide and Sermon Resource Guide for week 5 of the Sermon on the Mount Series (Matthew 5:21-26).
See this post from week 1 for more information about the parenting guides.
The Sermon Resource Guide is intended to aid you as you spend time studying the passage of Scripture from each week’s sermon on your own, with others, or even in your Gospel Community.
I am convinced that one of the greatest things hamstringing the witness of the church today is unreconciled issues amongst believers. When we have conflict amongst us, the church’s strength is sapped right out of her. The most common source of unreconciled issues is anger and conflict that arise simply because we are sinners.
Jesus seemed to be pretty concerned about this. Jesus says that when it comes to anger and conflict amongst Christians, eternity is on the line. Look, for example, at what he says in Matthew 5:21-23:
“You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not murder; and whoever murders will be liable to judgment.’ But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment; whoever insults his brother will be liable to the council; and whoever says, ‘You fool!’ will be liable to the hell of fire.”
In the above, Jesus refers to two Old Testament passages, namely, Exodus 20:13 (“You shall not murder” – aka the sixth commandment) and Numbers 35:30 which prescribed, “If anyone kills a person, the murderer shall be put to death on the evidence of witnesses.”
So when Jesus says if you are angry with your brother you will be liable to judgment, the judgment he is referring to is the same as that of murder as prescribed in Numbers 35:30 – death. Because he is referring here to death, we are to understand that eternity is on the line.
John said something similar when he said “Everyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him” (1 John 3:15).
What John is saying is the same thing Jesus is saying which is this: anger (unresolved and unreconciled) directed at a brother or sister in Christ is altogether incongruent with what it means to be a real Christian.
Again, eternity is as at stake.
If you are angry with your brother, that is not congruent with what it means to be a Christian.
If you are living in ways that are incongruent with what it means to be a Christian (and not seeking repentance and reconciliation), what evidence is there that you are, indeed, a real Christian?
If you are not a Christian, you are going to spend eternity in hell.
Therefore, the judgment of anger is the same as that of a murderer.
Jesus’ solution to this problem: deal with your junk, do it immediately, do it today.
“So if you are offering your gift at the alter and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the alter and go. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift.” (Matthew 5:23-24)
If you are a Christian, do not let your anger fester (see Ephesians 4:26). Do not allow conflict between you and your brother (fellow Christians – be it in your church or another church; be it a Christian parent or a Christian spouse or a Christian friend) to go unresolved. Take care of it TODAY.
The fame of the gospel, the witness of the church, and your eternity is at stake.
Below you will find the Parenting Guide and Sermon Resource Guide for week 3 of the Sermon on the Mount Series (Matthew 5:13-16).
See this post from week 1 for more information about the parenting guides.
The Sermon Resource Guide is intended to aid you as you spend time studying the passage of Scripture from each week’s sermon on your own, with others, or even in your Gospel Community.
Sermon on the Mount – Sermon Resource Guide Week 3
Sermon on the Mount – Parenting Guide Week 3
Below you will find the Parenting Guide and Sermon Resource Guide for week 2 of the Sermon on the Mount Series (Matthew 5:2-12).
See last week’s post for more information about the parenting guides.
The Sermon Resource Guide is intended to aid you as you spend time studying the passage of Scripture from each week’s sermon on your own, with others, or even in your Gospel Community.
This past Sunday we began a new series at 2 Pillars Church on the Sermon on the Mount.
Beginning with our series on the Sermon on the Mount, we will be producing Parenting Guides on a weekly basis and posting them here on the blog each week for use by parents during the week that follows.
As Deuteronomy 6:6-7 instructs:
And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.
Parenting Guides are being provided by 2 Pillars Church to help guide parents in guiding their children in family devotional time during the week. We recommend using this around the breakfast or dinner table with your Bible open. We provide five sections aimed to be used five days out of the week (one per day). If you miss a day, skip it and move on. Don’t allow this to be legalistic, but rather use it guide your devotional time together as a family.
This is the first week of our Sermon on the Mount Series. We will spend the next 20 weeks or so in this passage of Scripture as a church.
With this week being the first week of providing Parenting Guides, we want folks to start simple. The attached guide is designed to, very simply, get you into a routine of having family devotional time. Each day guides you through reading a passage of Scripture and then just asking a few basic, open-ended questions, and then a time of prayer. The whole thing could take as little as 5 minutes and as much as 15 or more depending on the age of your children and the level of dialog you foster.
Don’t worry about “doing it right.” If you’ve never done family devotionals or haven’t done them recently, it won’t feel “right.” The goal this week is, again, to simply begin to get you into the habit of having family devotions.
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